Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize