Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
