is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
