and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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