i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
