feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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