I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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