Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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