Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
You can't motorboat a personality
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize