a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
