He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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