What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
