Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
