the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
