Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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