Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
