He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I think a kid would responsible me up
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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