I think my vagina is haunted
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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