I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
