I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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