Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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