So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
