I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
