Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
COCAINE IS GR8
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
