Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
