he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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