oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
