I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
