Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
