he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize