week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
