Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
