Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
