I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
