Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
