what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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