She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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