It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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