hotel room ftw
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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