OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
All the doctor said was why
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
