I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
