i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
