i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I forget how to act sober
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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