Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
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