our cab driver is having phone sex.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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