Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize