Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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