At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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