I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
