No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
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