Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
